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Fear of Rejection or of Being Hurt

Do you shy away from relationships because you're afraid of being hurt? Too many people don't live their lives to the hilt and seem to be overwhelmed by the prospect of being hurt or of feeling rejected when a relationship ends.

Nothing is truer than this old saying:

"A life lived in fear is a life half-lived"

If you are one of these people who would rather stay at home because the thought of being rejected or hurt is too much to bear, read on.

If you think about ANY relationship in the following terms, you'll instantly release that fear you feel.

Everyone you meet in your life "even total strangers" is already intimately connected to you. The idea that we are all separate and distinct beings is nothing but an illusion. We are all parts of a larger whole, like individual cells in a body.

If you think about the universe as one big ball of energy and everything and everyone in it is interconnected, then the previous statement has real meaning. Think about it for a minute and then consider these points:
  • Connectedness - You don't have to "build" brand new relationships because you're already connected. Imagine that you're tuning in to a connection that's already there.
  • No risk - Little or no courage is required to approach strangers. You're never actually building new connections from scratch. You're just recognizing what's already there.
  • Equality - You can feel just as close to total strangers as you do to your friends or family.
  • Importance - All relationships are significant; none are irrelevant. Even strangers you pass on the street could become important to you.
  • Endings - Letting go of harmful relationships is easier because you're still connected to everyone else. As you release old relationships or you are released from a relationship that no longer serves you, you'll attract new ones that are much more compatible with you.
When you have a certain mindset about relationships, you begin to attract the right people at the right times. If you ask around amongst your friends, you're sure to find several who felt "they were destined to be together" from early on in their relationships.

I think the reason this mindset is so effective in creating new relationships is that when you assume a pre-existing connection with another person, he or she will tend to respond in kind. Usually the best way to break the ice with someone is to assume there never was any ice to begin with.

Applying the mindset

When you assume the mindset that we're all inherently connected, these are some of the actions and results that will come naturally to you:

Easy rapport - You'll connect with strangers almost as easily as you connect with your closest friends, sometimes more easily. The difference between strangers and friends is intellectual familiarity, but you can tap into an intuitive familiarity even with someone you've never met.

  • Fairness - You'll begin to feel a kinship with everyone, regardless of familiarity.
  • Attraction - Because you're always open to connecting with people, you'll begin attracting new relationships fairly easily. Compatible people will be drawn to you.
  • Chance encounters - You'll start meeting people you feel you're meant to meet.
  • Deeper relationships - You'll enjoy deeper, less superficial relationships.
  • Energy - You'll attract relationships that energize and excite you rather than drain you.
Fearless relationships

The real key in a successful relationship is removing fear from the equation. When you can relate to people without fear, which is a natural consequence of the belief that we're all connected, then it becomes much easier to form deep connections with another human being.

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